www.nathanweselake.com

It actually works (if we do our part).

As part of PAC "ONE BOOK" initiative I am reading through the book of Luke with 8 other people every second Wed. night at PAC U.  Last night was the second time, we covered Luke 6-12.  Simple format where we just share with each other the questions, insights, and convictions we encounter as we move through the text on our own during the interim days.  Heavy on application, low on academic insight which doesn't translate into life all that well.

Last night I absolutely loved it.  It is what a HouseChurch should be.  Everyone goes home, pursues God through His Word on their own, and then comes to their HC ready to share.  An hour and a half flew by and I was blessed. 

Whether it was a stay at home mom talking about how the scriptures challenge and affirm her as a parent or a couple grandfathers sharing how God takes certain words from the Bible and moves them so powerfully they can hardly speak; sublime or trivial, it was all awesome.  

I think every pastor dreams of times like that where people in his or her congregation give living proof of the power of the Bible in their lives APART from the teaching or influence or manipulation or pleading of the pastor.  

That is what it was last night.  No sexy promo's.  No celebrity endorsements of how amazing your evangelical life will be if you sit through 6 weeks of this dynamic teaching.  Just you, your bible, and some friends.  

I sat there thinking "this actually works!"  

Today I have modified my thinking to, "this actually works if we all DO OUR PART."  Our part being reading 6 chapters of the bible slowly, prayerfully, and thoughtfully in the span of two weeks.

Sadly, it has been a rare occasion in my experience where people actually DO THEIR PART.  

Way too many times its been a meeting / study group / House Church where the intention was to do something like we did last night and no one cracked their bible open since last time.  Instead of the kind of holy community moments where individual lives get caught up more fully in God's story, the group ends up simply apologizing to each other for not doing the reading and affirming to each other that they probably should have done the reading.  The group ends up talking about the weather, hockey game, and Aunt Mabel in Delaware who could use our prayers.  

It is all good (and we should hope the Lord heals Aunt Mabel in time for her annual trek to the outlet mall since it is a significant source of joy in her life at this stage of the game, plus she gets good deals on petunias there and it would be a shame if she had to pay full retail price).

Except as the Protege's will soon tell you, good is the enemy of great.

No one leaves the comfort of their house on a -23 night in Feb. to come to your house to get an update on Aunt Mabel unless they live with way more guilt than is healthy.

A GOOD HouseChurch is a 50/50 option with an important hockey game, a date with the treadmill, or a nap.

But a GREAT HouseChurch?  You'll have to add an extension to your house within a year to fit everyone in.  People plan the rest of their lives around it.    

PAC, the "ONE BOOK" will stir your soul, help you put down deep roots, bind you to each other, and leave you standing strong when life comes to crush you.  

But you have to do your part.  

Toronto Day 3

We arrived late to the first session of the day, but just in time to hear C. Peter Wagner talk again.  I am intrigued by this 80 year old guy.  All I knew of him was a vague WIllard recommendation from a lecture series 10 years ago where Dallas said "You don't know Peter Wagner?  You need to know Peter Wagner."  Now I know Peter Wagner.

In each of his sessions Wagner presented the most comprehensive vision of the Kingdom of God I have ever heard articulated.  Every sphere of human life and global system is imagined as coming under the reign of God.  We get used to hearing this in the Lord's Prayer, but you sit and listen to someone map out a plan for how he sees Christians "infiltrating" media, business, government, religion, technology, medicine, and education (called these the "7 M's") and the concreteness of it all is startling. 

You realize how abstractly you pray "Your Kingdom come your will be done on earth as it is in heaven" when someone begins to say  "First we do this, then we do this, and now that this is in place we will do this."  The specificity of it all was engaging but entirely new.

And then he talked about how the Freemasons need to be taken out of their seats of power in each of these 7 M's.  I never know what to do when someone starts blaming the Freemasons.  It always seems like a trailer park conspiracy theory.  When I mention my misgivings, "of course it seems that way, Satan is way to clever for his plans to be obvious, so he uses Freemasons to accomplish his devious plans".  This is not convincing because you can prove absolutely anything this way.  I don't know what to make of that, Wagner is clearly a brilliant man who doesn't just say things without being able to back them up.  For example, before beginning to teach on workplace and ministry he read 150 books across the various streams of theology and disciplines before beginning to articulate his own ideas.  So I don't know what to think.  Toying with the idea of joining the Shriners and working my way up.  At the least I will get to drive a cool little car and wear a beanie, eventually I may be president of the US since they are all Freemasons.  Plus I read, THE LOST SYMBOL and enjoyed it.

Then it was time for lunch, during which I enjoyed a fine roast beef sandwich. 

Aaron and I walked back to the hotel and I worked out for a couple hours.  I swam laps for the first time since my lifeguarding days, reconfirming for me that I was possibly the worst swimming lifequard that there ever was.  When I returned to our room Scott and Aaron were both in their jammies which was kind of amusing since it was 4pm and watching a Denzel Washington movie.  I realized I forgot my shirt at the pool and went to get it.  When I came back the lights were out in the room and my two charges were power napping.  It was the shortest nap ever as literally 30 seconds after I returned they declared themselves not tired anymore and played a few hands of poker whilst I managed my hockey draft trades.

Turns out the vegging time was time well spent.  The afternoon session was apparently not so good.  Even gracious Gloria didn't stay for the whole thing. 

Toronto Day #2

Day started with a early morning spin on the bike where the time just flew by as I was entertained by Scott and Aaron who were seriously pumping iron and in Scott's case packing on some quality mass.

Then it was off to Williams FRESH cafe for breakfast and then a cup of coffee at CUPPS which will never happen again.  You'd have to go to Texaco for a worse cup of coffee. 

Session started with more worship.  What is great about this conference is there is truly freedom to do whatever you want.  I listened and sang for awhile and then lied back in my chair and had a nap - waking up in time to hear some testimonies and Peter Wagner talking about "Dominion".  It was a good talk - nothing stands out though a few hours later except that his view of who satan is made me want to spend a little more time studying the topic since, while I am pretty well versed on several views, I don't really have any convictions about what or who the satan is and Wagner's talk made me think I should.

Then we had lunch.

Scott, Aaron and I were eating our wraps and a couple joined us.  We asked them how they met and turns out it was at Toronto.  This simple question unleashed nearly 20 minutes of listening to the guy talk about their sex life in the most awkward of ways. 

First he declared the three of us were "precious virgin sons of the most high God".  Unexpected.  Then he began instructing us how we could have sex with a virgin every night.  I was trying to contour my face into a blank look but one look at Scott and Aaron had me biting my inner lip hard to keep from cracking up.  By inviting the Holy Spirit into the bed to sleep between you and your wife, you are both pure and thus virgins going at it every night,  In the case of our new friend, the Holy Spirit also give you the endurance of veterans since you can keep er going for 8 hours. 

We all figured his wife must be mortified but she kept chiming in with her own nuggets.  When not talking he was twitching and yelping and eating his Tuna wrap with uncoordinated gusto.

I kept saying to myself as I looked at this guy talking about his incredible sexual prowess and how "salvation begins in the bedroom" that he was made in the image of God and was incredibly valuable and God may be trying to say something to us through him. 

But it was weird, no getting away from it, and when we were not laughing about the awkwardness of it after, we were clearly thinking about it.  I still am.  Some of what the evening special tackled had to do with being open to exactly this sort of thing but aside from some really abstract thing about how we falsely divide sexuality and spirituality, images of heaven coming to earth, and Sabbath as consummation.  I am not entirely what more will come of this revelation.  But I am sure glad it happened, I have not been more baffled and awkward ever.

During the evening session I camped out in an area where my sight lines allowed for me to see a screen with the speaker on in but not much else.  It was a wise move, able to listen and enjoy.

We will see where it all goes but I had some new thoughts coming out of the session:

- WPS and Elevate can find creative ways to accumulate "gold" on the kids over the years so that the next teacher can affirm and build off of what the last teacher saw God doing the previous year

- dots connecting over what PAC's second location should look like and some thoughts about where it could be

- text was "a prophet is not without honor except in his own country"; always an interesting text for me since I am at my childhood church.  Went in an entirely different direction inside me tonight. 

- found some music to accompany the lyrics

- culture of honor is a reoccuring theme I am hearing, new book I am reading, online article, and talk tonight, worth paying attention to.  I wonder if at PAC we spend to much time apologizing for who we are not instead of honoring who we are?

So their are my, upon writing them, rather cryptic bullets about today.  But it is all a little to fresh to elaborate on.  And I am too tired to even proofread it so if you all could give me grace on my spelling mistakes (I am talking to you Lil WHEE) it would be appreciated.

Toronto Airport Fellowship Day 1

Flew into Toronto this morning with protege's Scott and Aaron and Ray and Gloria Willms. 

The 5 of us are attending the pastors and leaders conference in this church that was the home of the Toronto Blessing.

Why are we here you ask?

 A few reasons:

1. To learn. 

Personally, I tend to be sceptical and analytical about the more sensational manifestations of the Holy Spirit.  If this is a barrier to my own personal experience of God or a barrier to how PAC may experience Him I want to confront it.

Also, most of the conferences we attend are heavy on the leadership teaching.   We already know more leadership principles than we can implement. 

2. To dicern.

Curious to see what Ray and Gloria feel about what is going on here.  Are there teachings or experiences which happen here which are not good for PAC or should we try to bring some of it "back"?

3. To fulfil the committments of the protege program.

Each protege gets to go to a conference.  Shea went to Catalyst in the fall.  Aaron and Scott get to come here.

The experience so far has definately been a trip.  We are continuously urged, in one form or another to allow God to bypass our mind, which is difficult for me.  As well, I am not entirely sure God desires to bypass my mind, or that I could stop Him if He wanted to.  I gave Him permission should He so desire.

To be fair, the lone speaker of the day, did a fantastic job I thought of providing a theological undergirding to all we were seeing.  He reminded me of one of my favorite professors at Regent College, Rikki Watts.  Watts was Cambridge educated and a happily Spirit filled man who loved to speak in tongues.  The combination of charismatic Holy Spirit presence and rigourous mind engaged and challenged me then, and the speaker today, Bill Johnson challenged me and helped me to be less cautious about the whole thing.

His talk was easily the most personally challenging talk I have heard in two years. Totally unexpected zigs and zags - I was on the edge of me seat the whole time.

The rest was a stretch.  A good stretch I suppose.

We arrived a bit late and it was "soaking" time.  A 3 hour block of time where you just lay around on the floor, chairs, or - if you brought one - a sleeping bag and enjoyed cultivating a sense of God's presence.  I do this plenty of times on my own, but doing it in a room of people was a bit different.  I prayed for awhile for whatever came to mind, meditated on some scripture, and then fell asleep for a couple hours.  It was like my Rest, Eat, Listen post from a few days ago.

Then it was supper time.  They didn't let me have seconds and I so I was hungry. 

Then it was time for session A.  Room much more full for this than "soaking".  The band played 4 praise songs and, no word of a lie, it lasted for 1 hour and 10 minutes.  A few guys to my left were howling with "holy laughter" (the idea here, although we are cautioned to not settle on a meaning lest we reduce it to something we can manage, is that when someone clearly sees God's glory their own problems seem so petty they can't stop laughing.  Kind of a neat idea and I had never seen it happen before.  It made me laugh seeing it, not in a condescending way I hope but in a kind of joyful amusement) and I couldn't watch them for long because I was unable to think about God with them chortling and thrashing about.  So much going on all around I had to just close my eyes.  But I am not a clapper or a singer or a rambunctious worshipper so it was pretty long for me.  The song kept saying "strength would rise as we waited upon the Lord" but I found it not to be the case personally.  By the 30th time through the chorus I had to sit down.

Then they kept introducing different people to us.  Each would say a few words then the pastor would have us pray or shout and the people we were just introduced to would fall over on stage and some would twitch for a long time.  This was probably the strangest part of the evening for me.  Strange that I was watching it happen, and strange that I wasn't terribly unsettled by it.

Then the preacher I mentioned, Bill Johnson, came up and was remarkable.  He preaches like no one else I have ever heard.  He says a couple sentences, then pauses way to long, then chuckles.  Then does it again, and again.  I realized halfway through my mouth was open in awe as I listened.  I was back in my comfort zone in some ways but the message was unsettling.

Then it was healing time.  Same guy who engaged my mind, Bill, led the healing.  It was different.  Had a sweet Spirit about it.  No one was put on the spot.  No grandstanding.  It was soft and pure.  I really enjoyed watching people getting healed.  Not every one was.  But many were.  And then at the very end he asked if anyone else wanted a "miracle".  The way he asked it seemed so odd - like late night Vision TV.  But a guy in front of us stood up and we were instructed to put our hands on him and pray.

So we did.  Scott, Aaron, and I and a few strangers put our hands on the guy and prayed.

My prayer (in my own head) was basically,

"God, heal this guy's knees.  I have no doubt you can do this if you want to but honestly, I am full of questions about this whole process.  Please do not let where I am at hinder anything you want to do in this guys's life. 

When we were done praying the guy did a few deep knee bends and realized he had no pain and range of motion he didn't have before.  He was over the moon ecstatic.  He just stood there with a big grin bending his knees up and down.  I kept thinking of the phrase from Acts "walking and leaping and praising God".

Scott and I figured between the two of us that was enough healing for the day and we all left soon after. 

There is no one lesson of the day but here is one good thing I learned.  It seems like when God does these stretching and (to me) strange things, he allows us to remain ourselves.  Coming here I was worried I would have to turn into some kind of emotive artistic flag waving worshiping jumping bean to truly appreciate a different angle on seeing God at work.

It wasn't the case.  I immensely enjoyed today with it's miracles, sublime silliness, and challenges.  It was joyful.  But one of the most joyous things was I was invited by the Holy Spirit to enjoy it as myself.

Reminded me of the definition of the Holy Spirit I  came up with during Jan 3. sermon: (although don't tell my new friends here at TACF we "defined" Him):

God's personal presence in you, helping you build the Kingdom by making you more like Jesus and by making you more like YOU.

Felt good to have that teaching confirmed here by experience.

 

Question Mark, Arrow, and Lightbulb.

Yesterday AM I hurried through explaining a simple method for helping a person begin a devotional life.  I was kind of all over the place and it wasn't as clear as it could have been - so I'll clear it up here.

In the margin of your Bible (and make sure you have a translation you enjoy reading and isn't frustrating - NLT, ESV, and Message are all good) as you are reading along and it is appropriate write either a:

Question Mark:

This notes something you don't understand and want to either ask a friend our your HouseChurch about.

Lightbulb:

This notes a place where you had a realization or an insight about who God is or what he does.  It is a general insight not a personal one.  But note it because God might want you to share it with someone to help a friends or someone in your HC.

Arrow:

This notes a place where you were personally convicted or challenged by something.  Tell a friend or someone in your HC about it so you have some help or accountability.

That is that - may it help you discover / enjoy the bible in 2010.

Thanks to the writers of "The Rabbit and the Elephant" for the idea.

Jesus, Augustus, and Ricky Bobby...

Most of the time, sermon preparation is an enjoyable and quick thing for me.  Every now and then though, I seem to dive into it and not be able to come up for air.  This week I feel like I am drowning a bit.

Here is why.

The sermon is on Luke 2:1-20.  A very familiar text for people already associated with specific memories and ideas.  But the associations are often dead wrong, or at least a far cry from what Luke is trying to get across and not in sync with what the angels say and what the shepherds feel.

So I am spending a large amount of time trying to make it clear why it matters that we deepen or change what Christmas means to us.  Exegetically the case is easy to make - we just want to be true to the story we actually have.  It is the application I am getting hung up on. 

Why does it change our behavior that there are two "saviors" now dueling it out for supremecy and we have a choice?

What does that choice look like? 

How do you make your own little kingdom look more like Jesus Kingdom and less like Augustus empire?

The following quote is one of several places I am going to explain how Luke is setting up two Kingdoms in confrontation with each other:

Providence has brought our life to the climax of perfection in giving to us Augustus, whom Providence filled with virtue for the welfare of men, and who , being sent to us and our descendants as a Savior, has put an end to war and has set all things in order; Caesar has fulfilled all the hopes of earlier times in surpassing all those who came before him, and finally the birthday of the god Augustus has been for the whole world the beginning of good news (gospel) concerning him, therefore let a new era begin. (OGIS 2, no. 458)

Good news?...unless you were 9 months pregnant and forced to do a 4 day journey on donkey.  Good news?...unless you were part of the majority living in the shadow side of Rome's might.  Good news?...unless you wanted to have a full belly instead of another palace for King Herod.

Anyway...all of the above needs to come together in one more day (supposed to be a day off) and I have a tragic little funeral to officiate at Sat AM.  Would appreciate your prayers.

Oh yeah, and I also have to incorporate the first 1:30 (where would you cut it off?) of this for Saturday night (deemed too much for the Sunday AM crowd):

 

 

 

 

Stop living as if parts of your life don't count.

"The Holy Spirit, however miraculous in the conception of life itself, doesn't seem to shortcut or skip anything that is human.  There is nothing in a Holy Spirit conceived life that exempts that life from the common lot of humanity.  It didn't skip anything in Jesus, "who in every respect was tested as we are" (Heb 4.15), and it doesn't skip anything in us.  And that means, of course, that there is absolutely nothing in us that it is inaccessible to or incapable of holiness.  Humanity itself is divinely precious.  The long, complex, danger filled, often painful process of growth from fetus to infancy to adulthood to parenthood and then on into old age is embraced and given meaning and dignity as God in Christ continues to be present in and for us by his Holy Spirit."

- Christ Plays in Community (269-270), Eugene Peterson.

This is good news for everyone who is WAITING for God to do something. 

He already is.

In you.  Around you.  Through you.  And for you.

I needed this reminder of how holy the ground is - and maybe you do too.

Holidays.

Back with a full tank and ready to go into fall.  Good thing tank is full because I am anticipating an awesome but busy fall.

1. 3 PAC Protege's start this Thursday.

- Shea Fust, Scott M., and Aaron Beauchamp are full time interns (35+ hours a week) at PAC until end of April.  This is probably the most exciting thing going this fall for me (and there is plenty exciting).

Shortly after these three had their applications accepted I came across this from Neil Cole in "Organic Leadership".

"The reality is that the impact of a conference speaker is shallow compared to that of the one who pours his or her life into a few people in a mentoring relationship." (48-49)

Not like I am speaking at conferences every weekend (or at all.) But nonetheless, this is pretty affirming, and when I compare the impact of Jake Enns, Ray Willms, Jerry Orthner, and Greg Langman on my life vs. the dozens of conference speakers I have heard who I have been amazed by - I have to agree with Cole.  Excited for the staff at PAC to be able to each play their part as we mentor and learn from Shea, Scot, and Aaron.

2. Addition of a Saturday Night Service.

This happens in October.  Actually wont affect me that much (will be speaking twice a weekend but I am excited about that - you put in a ton of time for you half hour of sermonizing and it is nice to be able to do it twice).  Praying this additional service is something God blesses.  I feel like He is leading us to do it.

3. Captain of my Hockey Team.

In lesser leagues this means you have to collect the money and pay the ref and call around to make sure you have enough guys.  In the BIG 4 league it means you have the honor and challenge of DRAFTING YOUR TEAM.  60 guys to be drafted by 4 captains.  Do you aim for chemistry, speed, locker room camaraderie, the guy who brings the best food, or playmaking ability.  It is a reputation maker or breaker and the pressure is on.

4. Starting Two New Blogs.

Got the bright idea during the holidays that this blog was covering too wide a group of topics.  Those who cared about bike racing didn't care about hockey trades didn't care about PAC didn't care about ecclesiology didn't care about my occasional weird little paragraphs about nothing.  Traffic reflected this inconsistency and I know some people just gave up.

So here is the deal:

This blog (www.nathanweselake.com) will be about PAC and other serious or at least half serious ministry related topics.  It will also be the blog for those who for some voyeuristic reason are interested in hearing about my foibles.

A second blog www.puckpastor.com will be about hockey, particularly fantasy hockey advice and analysis.  I have recruited a couple other guys to contribute. For the last few years, I have traded emails with these guys which have sometimes had me on the floor laughing and I thought we should put them online and see who else enjoys them.  Going to take some time to build up the site but keep checking in and commenting if you are in to hockey.

And finally, a third blog www.nathanweselake.com/gonerchurch/ is going to be the story of a fledgling church start up unfolding day by day. I have recruited someone else to write it because I could never be so cynical.  I will eventually register gonerchurch.com (Dave Ramsey will let me next month and since being introduced to him a year ago we have given away nearly twice as much in 2009 as 2008, kept tithing, been able to go on a nice holiday, pay off nearly 10k in debt, and set aside some decent savings even as Tamara took a job which dropped her salary 1/4, I am inclined to keep obeying him - new Dave Ramsey course starts this Sept at PAC and YOU SHOULD GO) and you can have a direct link.

5. PAC UNIVERSITY.

For almost exactly a year, we have been certain we needed something at PAC which intentionally helps PAC'ers move beyond the relying on the Sunday AM service/show as the primary means they use to become disciples.  Sunday AM alone doesn't work (and neither will Saturday PM).  For that matter, PAC U, wont work by itself either.  But it will help new Christians learn to read their Bibles, old Christians dive deeper into them, and it will help us all learn to pray better.

Plus if you say "PAC U" it sounds like someone with a strong german accent cursing you out.

Nice to be back, hope you all come BACK!

Saturday Mumblings.

- one of my faithful readers, Nettie Neudorf, is also a local road cyclist with the Junkyard Dogs, was 2nd at the Cd. Nationals in the ITT and 4th in the 57km Road race.  This is incredible.  I think this is her 3rd year cycling.  Fourth tops.  

- ate at Dubrovnik's last night for our anniversary.  One of the nicer establishments I have had the pleasure of masticating in.  What sets this apart from a few other places is not only the quality and presentation of the cuisine, but also the decent portions.  The owner told us to "tell our friends".  Friends I am telling you.  Plan on $75-$150 a person and tell 'em "Nath" sent you.

- sported my white shoes and new matching white belt during yesterday's festivities.  Tamara said I looked like I should be running around in circles saying "where is de plane?" over and over.  I didn't get her "Fantasy Island" reference because I am too young.

- enjoyed Costco today immensely.  I almost bought a lifetime supply of shaving cream for $9.  But then I decided not to.  But I did buy some Doritos which I will enjoy soon.

- beginning a new sermon series on Sunday called "THE PATH OF BLESSING"

I am particularly excited about using an electric foot bath during the first sermon as a prop.

- PAC is getting a new website for fall.  

- heading here in a few weeks to be a guest speaker.  The few times I have gotten to do this sort of thing I have immensely enjoyed it (even more than Costco, which, as indicated above, I do also immensely enjoy).  5 chapel times and a couple morning Bible studies.  Going to be tweaking some of the talks I used at PAC for the "GET A LIFE" series and some studies from the "21 Day Prayer Challenge".

Liam Neeson knows how to give good gifts to his children.

Watched TAKEN last night and it threw me for a loop.

 

Guy moves heaven and hell to try to rescue his daughter. Testosterone fueled justice against evil. When it was all done I was pretty pumped and trying to figure out how this particular story fits into the story of GOD. 

Started with seeing similarities between the father Liam Neeson plays and the Father Jesus describes in Matthew 7:11:

"If you then being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good gifts to his children."

Liam Neeson charges around the globe to rescue the innocent and he is just a man - how much more will our heavenly Father. 

Then I sat on it for a few minutes and my thoughts changed keys.

I thought of the Bolivian brothels still fresh in my mind.

I thought of some of the stories I hear during Books Bikes and Bagels at North Memorial.

I thought of my own lack of "changedness" at the hands of a God who I am told is radically changing me from the inside out.

I thought of a Heavenly Father whose timing is apparently perfect, but is still waiting.

I thought of Liam Neeson and felt he did a better job than my Heavenly Father is doing.

Stayed awake until 3am mulling it all over.  

Yeah I know it was a movie and yeah I know the answers.  But when these sorts of thoughts hit me hard, I like to live in them for awhile and not rush to a pre-packaged conclusion.  And so I will not bother to attempt to clean this up nicely because it is not about fear or doubt or being wrong.  

It is about wanting to know and understand and love the God who is there as opposed to the one I can live with most comfortably.